I test in six days. Looking at the short end of the 2WW isn't easy. I've had some promising symptoms, for example: Thursday and Friday last week it felt like there were knives in my boobs that were attempting to *stab* their way out. Never felt that before. And that was in addition to my tender nipples (which is common for me during the 2ww).
But no matter what, I have to keep telling myself that this didn't work. Because that passive hope I mentioned before? Its taken hold of the back of my mind.
I keep dreaming about babies. I dreamed my sister gave birth and it was a girl. I was holding it and I was so happy! I can only hope that it was a premonition of a time to come. Then last night I dreamed I had a baby (not sure if it was mine or I was babysitting or something), again, a girl - I was sitting up in bed holding it and trying to take its temperature.
Which reminds me: my temperature has been the same 3 days in a row, I wonder if the battery is wearing out in my thermometer...
I was sitting in church this morning and my mind started to wander. I began thinking to myself, "I wish I could stay like this forever. Vaguely hopeful that I am pregnant, with absolutely no proof to the contrary." It will all come crashing down on Easter weekend ::sigh:: Oh well. There's always next cycle.
It's so hard to keep our minds calm and content during a two week wait. I remember tallying up every symptom and non-symptom I could think of to see which side won out. Anything to hold out hope, or convince myself that it was over, depending on what mood struck me.
ReplyDeleteI hope that this cycle is your lucky cycle, and that these next 6 days go by quickly.
This is the hardest part!! Just hang on and try not to over analyze...here's hoping for a big fat bfp!!
ReplyDeleteI think the 2WW is the worst! How can you NOT be hopeful for the positive test? I try hard not to think about it, but that makes me think about it even more. I hope that, no matter the outcome, you will be able to enjoy the Easter holiday.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you that sometimes I wish I could stay in that hopeful phase. The TWW is torture but for a few days I blissfully convince myself that I am pregnant and that is a happy thought.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't worry too much about your temp. Sometimes mine will stay the same for a few days and I too get worried that it is out of batteries, but then it starts mixing it up so I figure it was just one of those weird things.