March 20, 2012

Unusually Calm

Going to California for a conference was a nice diversion from this cycle. While I was there I took all my clomid and got blood work done, but there was so much else going on I didn't have time to obsess over things as I have in the past. I was worried that coming back home would be a rude awakening and I'd fall to pieces. Afterall, Monday was my ultrasound where they checked to see if I had any decent sized follicles. If I didn't, I was one step closer to needing surgery (the ovarian drilling ::cringe::) in order to get pregnant.

I was planning for the worst without even hoping for the best. Imagine my surprise (sarcasm), when I found out I was wrong (much like George Castanza, perhaps I should live my life doing the opposite of what I would usually do since all my instincts appear to be wrong). Two decent sized follies! And on only 100mg of clomid. A 17 in one ovary and a 14 in the other. That's really good for a CD14 scan for me - I'm a late ovulator. Dr. B was pleased and told me I could use the HCG trigger shot Wednesday night for a Friday morning IUI. Holy cow! So...this is happening! I was honestly prepared to accept this cycle as a wash and prepare myself for surgery and a 2 month forced break while I recover. Instead, as of Friday I'll be in my 2 Week Wait! Crazy crazy...

And I feel really calm about all this, amazingly enough. I considered getting out my BBT thermometer to start tracking my temps again so I can see the exact day  ovulate. But I haven't been sleeping well since I got back from my trip and I know that could throw things off. Even if this trigger shot does the trick and I ovulate one or two juicy eggs, there's still the issue of M's swimmers. He has only vaguely and sporadically been taking his vitamins that are supposed to help with morphology (heaven forbid I say anything about it though because he's "trying"!). At least I know he hasn't been in any hot tubs... So I will be very interested to see what his "sample" looks like after they've washed it and cleared out all the...debris, let's say. I want to know if IUI is a good idea for any subsequent cycles or if Dr. B thinks we'll have a good chance with Timed Intercourse.

Maybe the reason I'm so collected this cycle is because with every Dr. visit I get more information, a clearer picture of what we are up against and whether treatment is working. Instead of sitting around going crazy wondering if the clomid is working, will I ovulate, is this EWCM for real? I *know* for certain what is going on and that provides a lot of peace of mind. I feel more confident that someday I *will* get my take-home baby.

Now, remind me about all this next week when I am FREAKING OUT over the tiniest non-symptom, haha!

8 comments:

  1. You sound like you are in a great place right now, I'm jealous hehe.

    That is great news about the scan and IUI! I ovulate too so I understand about having those follicles on CD 14, those are great sizes. Hopefully the swimmers will be good too ;)

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  2. I hope you get all good news and have a fantastic IUI on Friday!

    I'm like you, I find knowledge and understanding of what's going on to be calming, not stressful. Yay for your peace of mind!

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  3. #1) Next time you come to CA, you better give me a heads up!! :)
    #2) It's amazing how quickly things happen and all the sudden everything seems like its going into hyper drive. But fast is good in this grueling land of IF.
    #3) So excited for your IUI. This is your first, right?
    #4) The beauty of an IUI, is the sample doesn't need to be as large to work. So even a small one can be a good one.
    #5) I'm glad you're back. You've been missed.

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    1. I love the food in CA, but every time I travel there, my flights get all screwy - maybe CA doesn't like me! And yes, this will be my first IUI. I want to have the best possible chance with this cycle and I also want the opportunity to discuss whether IUI will be necessary for any subsequent cycles.

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  4. Ooh, a 2WW! Super exciting. All I can tell you is stay super busy and distract yourself as much as possible! I'm sure you know that, though. :)

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    1. Yeah, after a few false 2ww's early in my TTC time, I've gotten a lot calmer about it. But halfway is usually my breaking point, when I start going crazy even though I swore I wouldn't. I'm going to try to stay as busy as possible!

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  5. That's great news about the IUI! Hope it goes fabulously. Every time I reach a state of calm it all falls apart at 7 dpo. At least you know it will happen. That one thing is totally predictable.

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    1. I have a feeling this is going to be me, exactly XD

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