I think its pretty clear I have been going through a not-good time lately. I'm nowhere near out of the woods either. In fact, the crap and the stress just keep piling up. I'm beginning to wonder if I'll end this year with an ulcer.
The cat still isn't using his litter pan with, what I would think is, sufficient regularity. Do we wait it out? Do we take him back to the vet (goodbye more money that we don't have)? I don't know.
The new stress is that my parents have finally decided they have to find a new home for one of their dogs. They have two cairn terriers, whose personalities are as different as the color of their fur. The one is getting old and has lost most of his hearing. He's old, a little skittish, and kind of crabby, but we love him. The other, Ralph, is about 3 or 4 years younger, but acts like a puppy - TONS of energy. This causes many doggie disagreements and they've been getting worse. Ralph needs more attention and exercise than my parents can give because their jobs require long hours and are high stress and my parents are getting older. God I hate saying that...my parents are getting *older* ::shiver:: Anyway, my mother finally admitted this is not a good situation for either dog and so, with much regret and pain, she has asked me to find Ralph a new home. Cue epic stress ball that I did not need to add to my collection. Obviously, I want to make sure I find him a safe, happy, and healthy home. My mom cries at the thought of him being mistreated. Add to this that my dad is "fed up" with dealing with the two dogs and things at my parents' house are... well, "not going well" is putting it ever so lightly. So I'm under a lot of pressure to place Ralph quickly in order to alleviate some of the strain on my parents' relationship.
Sound fucked up enough?
Cause there's more.
But I don't have the time, inclination, or emotional energy to write about the rest of it.
I've decided to start praying for *acceptance* and *contentment* in all situations. So much of what is stressing me out these days is far beyond my control. I have no way of knowing where the end is or what form it will take. The only thing I can hope or ask for is to weather the storm and not make it worse by railing against it (doesn't do any good anyway). It has turned out to be a very good thing that I am not actively trying to get pregnant right now.